panic and anxiety

It was a good day here at work. I love my job and my daily interactions.  I am blessed to have so many amazing people in my life, work, and home.


With all that is good, I still suffer from anxiety/panic attacks, just when I think they have gone for good, something comes into my life to manifest the symptoms again.  That subtle wave that sweeps over you, the flip of your stomach, and that instinct to shut down, no mater where I you are.


As I ponder, what it could be causing me this angst, I usually already know, but it is good to think these things through...no?  I know, but that is the easy part, what to do with what one knows is the hard part.  I do not like letting people down, confrontation, or hurting anyone's feelings, unless they are my own.  It is easier to be disappointed in my own actions than hurt I have placed on others.  I also do not express my feelings and then things go way beyond where I would have liked, and then others feelings do get hurt, because I do not make myself accountable for my actions.


So to let someone down, it will make me sick, why..... because I cannot own up to my own truth.

Love and Light

fear of what will be....

Though we have no control over what will be, we still worry

· worry about the hatred in the world

· worry if war will ever end and human rights violations go on forever

· worry why there is so much violence in the world

All this worrying takes away who we can be, if we can do small of kindness and then HOPE that small act makes a difference and we can go forward in hopes that person will do an act of kindness for the next person they meet...I am going to try and not worry and just be kind and hope it becomes a gentler world

Love and Light 

be open to change

Change is around us every day and every moment, so why do we fight it?

We are comfortable with things as they are, constant and steady, whether uncomfortable or not.

We allow ourselves to stay there and not move on, something I have done my whole life, as not wanting to hurt others feelings. 

Relationships are like that, not wanting to hurt someone’s feelings, so allowing things to go on and on, even though it is not healthy for a anyone.  I am learning to step away from situations that I have allowed to become a constant, but not fulfilling.  They may reconfigure themselves into a healthier situation or they may just be a stop on the journey.  Either way, take what you can from it and learn more about yourself, because that is what it is about.  If you are not content within yourself then you cannot be giving and caring to anyone else and all your relationships suffer.

So be the best you can be....

Love and Light

the road

days of sound, nights quiet

peacefulness within

time to reflect on the road

my wish for the world

kindness